TOUGHER THAN THE TOUGH LIFE......

TOUGHER THAN THE TOUGH LIFE......
Shakssszzzzzz, what is it?....why does it happened it that way?.... Is GOD with me?.... Of all people why me?.... Why not those robbers, murderers, hold uppers and terrorist?.... Why my mother?.... These were the questions I ask myself when I was still in college, the time we lost our most caring and beloved mother. After nine years of battle against colon cancer she finally joined her creator in peace.....

I used to be a dependent person, in my actions and my decisions, I always ask the approval of my mother, "mama's boy" as some of my friends call me. And losing her was the biggest thing ever happened in me and that was a major turning point in my life, as an eldest I have to be strong for my younger siblings though that time I'm in full depression and living in grief. I tried hiding what I really feels inside of losing her, I talked to no one of what I really feel, i want to scream my heart out!, I might lose my sanity but thanks god I have strong faith in GOD that he always bring my sanity back, I wanna explode anytime that time, yet I have to be strong, TO BE TOUGH AGAINST THE TOUGH LIFE...

But I cant hide the fact that my mother was a great lose in our life, she used to be our wings whom kept believing that we can fly through our dreams, she used to be our fins that keeps us flowing and swimming against the flow of life, she used to be the breadwinner that provides us with everything. What will happen to us? will I still go to school to finished my college course? How can we survive? How's my brother? My sister? So many questions running in my head. Am asking God for a million dollar answer for my billion dollar question. But then again I have to be strong, I HAVE TO BE TOUGH AGAINST TOUGH LIFE....

Well, lucky as we are, we had survive some of the war, war against the tough life,war against depression, war against life heartaches. We both finished our college courses, but the war is still on, as long as we live, we have to face struggles and conquer life's challenge, we have to experience ups and downs of life,we have to win, we have to lose, yet, WE HAVE TO BE TOUGHER THAN TOUGH LIFE....

More than two years after my mother passed, my father again got married, or should I say that he again find a partner in his life, but it leaves no pain in us(with my bro and my sis) since we understands him, we know for a fact that we can't give what he needs, as you know what I mean, and besides, he needs a partner whom he can hold hands with in conquering their remaining challenges in life.
for now, I can proudly say that I am tough enough in conquering life challenge. Though I did not win all the battles in life, I believe so, that I had given my best fight. And in some instance that people see that I lose in some of my battles, I will stand straight and proudly say that At least I tried my best to put a good fight, not to mention that I learned from my mistakes, and if again these situations will come my way, at least I know how to win, because I learned from my mistakes, I learned from my life. There's no more room of losing a life's battle. Never again I will lose.I will keep on conquering life challenge, I will keep on fighting in the best way I can, I will not lose again, never again, because i am TOUGHER THAN THE TOUGH LIFE.